{"id":8471,"date":"2026-08-04T11:04:25","date_gmt":"2026-08-04T11:04:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/relocationtimess.com\/?p=8471"},"modified":"2026-08-04T11:04:25","modified_gmt":"2026-08-04T11:04:25","slug":"what-to-do-if-your-kid-needs-help-making-friends-this-school-year","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/relocationtimess.com\/?p=8471","title":{"rendered":"What to do if your kid needs help making friends this school year"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>\n<div>\n<p>\n<em>This article is one of a three-part series designed to help kids and parents begin the school year smoothly. Monday\u2019s story covered what to do when children <\/em><em>don\u2019t want to go to school<\/em><em>, and Wednesday\u2019s story will focus on parental concerns about their school\u2019s decisions.<\/em>\n<\/p><p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/relocationtimess.com\/?p=8467\">What we\u2019ve learned about Covid-19 since the pandemic<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\n            As your child heads back to school, they\u2019re probably thinking about who their friends will be this year.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            Ninety percent of parents think their kids want to make more friends, according to the 2024 C.S. Mott Children\u2019s Hospital National Poll on Children\u2019s Health. That\u2019s good, because healthy friendships can make kids happier, improve their self-esteem and resilience, and protect against loneliness and depression.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            In my decade of speaking to parents, students and educators about how to handle kids\u2019 screen time, I\u2019ve repeatedly heard that young people are struggling to keep up true friendships. That phenomenon could partly be because so many kids confuse the number of online followers they have with close relationships. What\u2019s more, all the time kids are spending on screens is time they\u2019re not learning how to interact with peers face-to-face.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            Here\u2019s the good news: \u201cChildren naturally make friends,\u201d said Anna Seewald, a Princeton, New Jersey-based psychologist and host of the \u201cAuthentic Parenting\u201d podcast.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            What they need from parents is the opportunity to create friendships and help maintaining them, she said.\n    <\/p>\n<h2>\n        Extracurricular activities aren\u2019t enough\n<\/h2>\n<p>\n            Put young kids in the same place and most will naturally play and have fun together, Seewald said.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            \u201cNo. 1 is providing spaces and opportunities,\u201d she said. \u201cToday\u2019s children are overstructured, and they are in a lot of extracurricular activities.\u201d But they need plenty of free, unstructured time in order to make friends, she added.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            Seewald explained that if your child has four or more extracurricular activities you may need to increase the unstructured free playtime.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            Sure, your child can make a friend at an extracurricular activity. But at gymnastics or soccer, \u201cthey are usually following instructions and there is very little or no time for socialization,\u201d she said. Often, they get redirected or reprimanded if they try to chat. That\u2019s why \u201ckids usually need to meet outside of the soccer practice to deepen their friendship,\u201d Seewald said.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            If children don\u2019t have places to develop friendships, they don\u2019t have the opportunity to work on their social and emotional skills. That lack of development could leave them awkward and shy, she said.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            On the other hand, if a teenager is struggling and isn\u2019t involved in any activities, encourage them to explore their interests as a way of making those initial connections.\n    <\/p>\n<div>\n<header>\n<span>\n      Related article\n    <\/span>\n<\/header>\n<section>\n<div>\n<div>\n<div>\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\">\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" alt=\"A teenage girl lies on the bed in her room lightened with orange and teal neon lights and watches a movie on her mobile phone.\" class=\"wp-image-2542\" height=\"144\" src=\"https:\/\/relocationtimess.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/6ed2a4abbfc7ec2d68febd5b60948999.jpg\" width=\"256\"\/><\/figure>\n<\/figure>\n\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div>\n<div>\n<div>\n<span>A teenage girl lies on the bed in her room lightened with orange and teal neon lights and watches a movie on her mobile phone.<\/span>\n<\/div>\n<figcaption>Georgijevic\/E+\/Getty Images<\/figcaption>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<p>\n<span>Teens need to press pause on late-night doomscrolling<\/span>\n<\/p>\n<div>5  min read<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/section>\n<\/div>\n<p>\n            Then allow your teen to hang out in person with the people they meet at those activities. Young people told the researcher danah boyd they want to get together with their friends in person. The problem is their parents often won\u2019t let them! Although it might be tempting to think kids are safer at home, they\u2019re almost certainly better off getting together with friends face-to-face. (There are plenty of predators on social media.)\n    <\/p>\n<h2>\n        Help kids maintain friendships\n<\/h2>\n<p>\n            The problem most kids have is not making friends \u2014 it\u2019s keeping them, Seewald said.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            Sometimes friend trouble starts young. \u201cIf something goes \u2018wrong\u2019 during the playdate, if two children fight over a toy, or there is a conflict, usually parents feel guilty, they interrupt the playdate, they don\u2019t want to come back,\u201d Seewald said. That\u2019s not the right approach.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            Instead, parents should help kids figure out how to share, solve problems and resolve other issues that come up.\n    <\/p><p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/relocationtimess.com\/?p=8453\">What to watch in Michigan\u2019s Democratic Senate showdown and other key races in Tuesday\u2019s primaries<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\n            \u201cWe need to coach them through difficult moments and teach them that relationships come with conflict,\u201d Seewald said. With experience, kids learn that having disagreements is natural.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            Many people see relationships as disposable and cut people off when things get difficult, Seewald said. Instead, we should teach kids how to repair the relationship, forgive the person and show compassion, she said.\n    <\/p>\n<div>\n<header>\n<span>\n      Related article\n    <\/span>\n<\/header>\n<section>\n<div>\n<div>\n<div>\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\">\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" alt=\"A woman who looking at her smartphone\" class=\"wp-image-8470\" height=\"144\" src=\"https:\/\/relocationtimess.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/08\/942e96eb7f07f54229f1c61bc1fd57a5.jpg\" width=\"256\"\/><\/figure>\n<\/figure>\n\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<div>\n<div>\n<div>\n<span>A woman who looking at her smartphone<\/span>\n<\/div>\n<figcaption>mapo\/iStockphoto\/Getty Images<\/figcaption>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div>\n<p>\n<span>Social media doesn\u2019t strengthen your friendships. What works<\/span>\n<\/p>\n<div>4  min read<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/section>\n<\/div>\n<p>\n            As kids get older, parents can be a sounding board and offer advice on how to navigate the tricky situations that inevitably come up instead of ghosting people.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            If your child won\u2019t talk to you or is experiencing big challenges, a therapist can be helpful.\n    <\/p>\n<h2>\n        Talk about digital etiquette\n<\/h2>\n<p>\n            Older kids often maintain relationships via text or apps, so it\u2019s also important to teach them how to do so.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            \u201cWe can teach them how to communicate respectfully through text, to not use harmful, derogatory language that can hurt someone\u2019s feelings,\u201d Seewald said.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            Also discuss with kids when it\u2019s appropriate to have a face-to-face conversation. Breaking up with a romantic partner via text isn\u2019t OK, she said.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            Of course, when kids type instead of talking, they don\u2019t have a lot of context to figure out what people mean, so they usually have to make assumptions. It\u2019s easy to misinterpret a short sentence a friend quickly fired off, especially since kids can\u2019t see the other person\u2019s facial expressions or hear their tone of voice.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            That\u2019s why when I talk to young people about how to protect and empower themselves online, I recommend that they pause when their feelings are hurt and try to talk to the friend in person to resolve things.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            Another big topic to discuss is privacy, Seewald said. Teach kids not to share what friends send them without permission.\n    <\/p>\n<h2>\n        Maintain friendships yourself\n<\/h2>\n<p>\n            One of the best ways to teach kids how to have healthy relationships is to model them, Seewald said.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            She advises making your home a welcoming place. Invite people over and visit friends in their homes, too. That\u2019s how kids pick up on skills such as small talk.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            \u201cWe know adults also struggle with friendships, but if we want our children to have friends we need to show them how we socialize, how we entertain our friends, how we hang out,\u201d Seewald said. \u201cWe don\u2019t do much of that these days.\u201d\n    <\/p>\n<p>\n            We all need friends. Thankfully, making them isn\u2019t as hard as we might think. The trick is creating the right opportunities and being willing to work through the challenges that arise.\n    <\/p>\n<p>\nKara Alaimo is a professor of communication at Fairleigh Dickinson University and advises parents, students and teachers on how to manage screen time. Her book \u201cOver the Influence:  Why Social Media Is Toxic for Women and Girls \u2014 And How We Can Take It Back\u201d was published in 2024.\n<\/p><p>Read more <a href=\"https:\/\/relocationtimess.com\/?p=8439\">Trump lashes out as political losses pile up<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Youngsters are struggling to maintain true friendships, says screen-time expert Kara Alaimo, who provides expert advice on how to fix the problem this school year.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":8468,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8471","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-health","category-wellness"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>What to do if your kid needs help making friends this school year - 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